Mindful Chat With Erin McCullough -IMPENETRABLE JOY

I teach people Impenetrable Joy: the ability to no longer be at the mercy of people or circumstances to dictate whether they have a good/bad day, or good/bad life.  To learn how to be calm, have peace of mind, and meaning in their life now.  To understand the difference between happiness and joy and how to find and cultivate their joy so that it is the predominant experience in their life.  And, to understand why they are here and what they are meant to be doing.

Erin McCullough is a thought leader, an in-demand speaker and an international teacher that helps people create IMPENETRABLE JOY so that they can be calm, have peace of mind and meaning in their life, NOW!  Erin had an Anxiety Disorder that had her holed up in her home for nearly a year.  Through that experience she learned how and why that happened and developed strategies to overcoming and preventing it, which is what she now teaches. Erin vowed that when she found solutions to overcoming and preventing anxiety, she would do whatever she could to make sure that no one had that experience, so that has been her mission.  Erin spent a decade studying the Mind/Body connection, Visualization and ways to still the mind.  Over the decade she has created simple strategies to Overcoming and Preventing Anxiety, Stress, Worry and Overwhelm so that all her clients live a life intentionally in Joy.  She has been an entrepreneur for 21 years and consulting businesses and business leaders for 16 years.  If you question who you are and what you are meant to be doing in this life, let Erin help you discover your own path to joy.


https://www.erin-mac.com/

Transcript

Damaris Grossmann: 0:25

Hi, how are you? This is the mindfully integrative show. And this is Dr. Damaris Grossman. And today we have a wonderful guest for this mindful chat. Her name is Erin McCall. And she is a joy, teacher, author, speaker. And she has many of talents and a wealth of knowledge for you to kind of bring into the integrative space and for others to bring a little bit more joy and love within yourself. So I can't wait for you guys to meet her and for us to learn a little bit more about. So thank you so much, Erin, for coming on the show.

Erin McCullough: 1:06

Thanks so much for having me. I'm thrilled to be here.

Damaris Grossmann: 1:09

I really appreciate it. And I ask those that come on just kind of like just something fun that people may not know about you, they may not find on like just a bio or just to look you up something that is just a little fun factor. Little trade that people may not know.

Erin McCullough: 1:28

Well, I love to be silly, and I often will play practical jokes on my teenager. for entertainment.

Damaris Grossmann: 1:38

Nice, nice. Um, what kind of jokes do you play?

Erin McCullough: 1:43

Oh, you know, things like, I'll go to the health food store and buy something that looks good, but tastes awful. And I'll leave it out for her. Your like, oh, try this new thing and tastes? Good. You should try. FYI, I used to do that to my college roommates as well.

Damaris Grossmann: 2:04

Oh, no. That's pretty funny. So you're kind of like goofy kind of fun is that where that joyfulness came in? Being that your history? And from what I've read about you, you have years of executive leadership, but not you. A lot of it has to do a lot about people's future their outcomes and and bring more joy into someone's life? What brought that on? For you? Was there a story that kind of made you more joyful? Or were you always kind of having that? Or was there something kind of in your life that was like, Alright, I need to be more joyful, like what happened? Tell us a little bit about that.

Erin McCullough: 2:43

Oh, my gosh, okay. So it's there was three sort of defining moments that led me to this. The first was an anxiety disorder, the created through talk therapy. And I say I created it, because I know now what anxiety and a lot of the low level experiences are there an attempt to not feel your actual feelings. So anxiety itself is not an emotion, it's an emotional experience. And so when you choose that, and not to say this is not a blame, or shame or anything like that, it's, it's recognizing how powerful we are that we can choose emotions, we can choose experiences. And we can and choose the ones that we don't like. And that's a lot of the work that I do with people. And so I created the anxiety disorder so that I wouldn't have to feel the feelings of the trauma that had happened in my childhood. Once I had recovered from that experience of anxiety through naturopathic, or I was a homeopathic remedy that I had received from a homeopathic psychiatrist, I realized that I had kind of a new lease on life. So I moved to a small town thinking that I would, you know, never get triggered. And you know, it would be simple. And lo and behold, I was still there. So I brought all of that with me, and created it again, I started a business that I had for 18 years that I was able to sell a few years back. And it took off like gangbusters. And so all the anxiety and stress and overwhelm that came with that was the same experience that I had created with the anxiety disorder. And so I had my second defining moment was I had a stressful morning, a client called and was upset and I was frantic to go and help her. And I raced over to a friend's house and I backed my car into her driveway and I sideswiped my car and her husband's truck. And I found out that he was under the truck working on it when that happened, and he thought it was going to land on him. And that changed things for me. I thought, you know, this is not okay to live your life this way. So crazy and stressed out and overwhelmed that you nearly killed somebody. And so then I delved into self development and reading all the books and going to seminars and the needle started to move a little I started to recognize that, you know, I was creating some of this and things started to change a bit but I would say you know prior to the last Five years I was you know, type a super goal oriented, high octane. Everything you know is doing triathlons and crushing money goals, and I had all the things and my business was crazy successful and, and I found myself a few years later in a divorce, which was the third defining moment. And that divorce leveled me because I had spent all that time in the self development arena, thinking that I had all these strategies and things to pull me out of that experience. And I didn't. And then a series of things happened, I picked up a book called The Course in Miracles. And I had the experience that month two, that I kept seeing the word joy, like the answer is joy, the path is joy, joy, joy. And I thought, okay, I hear you, I got it, Joy's the thing, I don't know how to get there. And then as the you know, as whatever you believe works, you know, things just show up when you're ready. And I went to a seminar and I learned a visualization process. And through that visualization process, I found my joy. And I had never experienced that before. And maybe we can talk about the difference between happiness and joy in a moment. But I had no idea what joy meant, actually. And so when I discovered that I went and trained under that gentleman who taught me the visualization to teach his regular seminar, and I stood in front of my first seminar, teaching, and it was like this download of all the things that I've ever read everything I've ever experienced, just culminate in that moment. And I went, this is what I'm supposed to be doing, teaching people how to find their joy and cultivated daily, so they can have that as our predominant experience.

Damaris Grossmann: 7:22

Did you when you experience that first time of that joy? Was it? Were you almost afraid? Did it come out? Like, overwhelming are? Was it relieving?

Erin McCullough: 7:37

Yeah, that's interesting. Nobody's ever asked me that question before, it was not overwhelming. Well, it was overwhelming. But in a really, really good way. Not in like, you know, I don't know how to handle this kind of a way.

Unknown: 7:52

Like it is.

Erin McCullough: 7:55

Yeah, I mean, it was like, I didn't think it was possible to feel that that way. And so that visualization that I was taught, and then I teach now, it's similar to that one, is really about creating an elevated emotional experience, right, because I know for myself, and I think most people feel that they are their thoughts and their emotions. And so their experience of life tends to be a roller coaster ride of, you know, this thing happened or didn't happen. And I didn't like that. And so you're in reaction to all these things. And when I realized that, through that visualization, slash meditation thing that I was doing, that I could change the experience immediately, by, you know, getting in touch with all of the senses, you know. And so the visualization that I teach is a it's like a day in the life of everything you ever want to create, starting from moment, one, waking up, to going to sleep and all the things, but on such a visceral level, that you can raise your emotional experience. And so I use the example like, if somebody knocked on your door right now, and you answered it, and they were like, you just want a brand new car? I mean, at first, you might go. Okay, yeah, right. But then when you saw the car, and you saw the brand new keys, you'd be pretty elated, right? No matter what was going on prior to you know, you could have been stressed out and all the things going on, you answer the door, you get a new card, like yay, I got a new car, right? So that tells you that you can change that. It's just that. I think a lot of times we don't think we're in control of our thoughts, and and our emotions and so on. We don't know that we're the ones and we allow our brain, our mind, our emotions to dictate our experience, then, then we are beholden to them. And that's what I'm penetrable joy. That's what I teach is impenetrable joy. no longer being at the mercy of people or circumstances to dictate whether you feel good or bad, or whether you have a good or bad day or whether you have a good or bad life for that matter. Like it's all your responsibility to create that environment internally.

Damaris Grossmann: 10:23

You come up with a very good point of like the so you help teach people to be more empowering by bringing this impenetrable, impenetrable joy. Correct? Is that how you say it? Yes. And is it impenetrable, because you're trying to make sure people don't get there, you can't get past it. It's not it's not able to be like, no one can just break up that feeling, you're saying that they've learned, you're going to help them teach those tools that they don't lose that feeling?

Erin McCullough: 10:51

Yeah, when you recognize that the work is internal and not external, then you can navigate and and, you know, manage the internal landscape, versus trying to most people's experience. I mean, so I'll just tell you stress, anxiety, overwhelm, worry, all of those things are experiences that we create, and they're external. When you can navigate the internal, then those things don't exist anymore. Not saying they never happened, they do happen. But you have tools, you have strategies, and you can go inside and go, Wait a minute, I remember that I'm okay. This moment is okay. It seems like it's not okay. Because those things are about projecting into the future, right. They're from past experiences projecting into the future. And we're living so much in the future. There's no freedom in that the freedom is in the present moment. Right now, right here, everything's fine. There's nothing wrong with right now. And that's that story, we make up about what we think is going to have in the future happen in the future. That is creating the low level experience. Because right now, literally, everything's fine. like nothing's happening.

Damaris Grossmann: 12:09

We're having a conversation. But we're talking about the you know, the story, but people do they live in that future. They live in their past, you know, and, and they don't know how they get totally stuck, right? You're you having to talk them through that that must be, you know, a lot, sometimes.

Erin McCullough: 12:27

Yeah, I have a friend who calls it future tripping, I like that, right? So you're going on a trip in the future when the future is not here yet. You're making up all the reasons why you can or can't do something or why it's gonna be hard or not hard or whatever. And not in those say, it's like 99% of the time, everything that you thought about that was going to happen in the future, based on that story you made. Doesn't even happen. But we never go back and go, Oh, my mind created this whole thing. And it's not real.

Damaris Grossmann: 13:01

Right, right. You spoke earlier about happiness versus joy. What exactly Can you speak about that? And what exactly did you mean by that? what you were saying the difference of it? Is it just that people don't understand the definition of it? Or is it more of a feeling? Could you go speak to that a little bit?

Erin McCullough: 13:20

Sure. Happiness is based on external things, that's the new car, that's the new house, that's the you know, whatever the certificate, the job title, the all the things that's all external in there short lived, that brand new car, while you may jump up and down, when you first get it after a week, a month or a year, it's just a car, right? It just gets you from A to B, it's not any different than the last car, or except maybe that one didn't get get a B. So that's where you got a new car. But Joy has that same exuberance, but it doesn't exactly have to Joy has so many different nuances that has stillness, and peace of mind, which is no thought or not thinking or overthinking peace, you know, calm. And those things are, you know, cultivated. So that's, you find the things that create that experience. And you continue to live those in your mind and your visualization. You're resetting, you're retraining your brain to go back to that space or to this moment, because true freedom is in this moment, the only moment we're guaranteed as a matter of fact. And so when we keep coming back to right now, they're still like, I can't explain. It's I've been thinking about this a lot lately. This idea of stillness. I never had that in my life prior to the last five years. I didn't even know what that was. And now I can just sit quietly, and be at peace. And it's so wonderful. I'm not overthinking things. I'm not thinking anything. In fact, most of the time, whereas before my experience was constantly like, I need to find the answer. You know, again, external, right? We're constant. We're taught from a young age to externally find the answers and I want I encourage people to look inside because inside are all the answers for you.

Damaris Grossmann: 15:30

That's, that's really important for people to understand. I think sometimes people are too afraid to go in, people are not willing, or they don't even want to listen. So the fact that you're, you know, trying to get them past their, their, their barriers is super important. Um, do you have I don't know, necessarily have to say client per se, but you have a story that you'd like to share about someone or for yourself that has helped through out the years or with your, your teachings.

Erin McCullough: 16:06

You know, I feel like, so it's so interesting, each client comes to the table at a different place on their path. And just FYI, for everybody listening, you are on your path, 100%, you can't not be on your path. It's right there, you're on it, you're making the choice as best as you can, based on all that, you know, for my clients, you know, the winds look like I was able to navigate my business without being stressed out and anxiety ridden all the time, I was able to find some work life balance to where, you know, I could set my business up in a way that it's successful. And I can get aligned in myself, so that I don't have to beat my head against the wall all the time, or put in extra hours, because, you know, maybe I went to work and I wasn't able to get focused. And so I didn't just sit there and wait to get focused, I did some exercises got focused, got very efficient about what I was doing and super clear, and moved on my way was able to create deep meaningful relationships with, you know, my children, like connect with them in a way that I've never been able to before. And my spouse, you know, changed the dialogue in the home to things that are working for us, versus the things that aren't working out, which is what most people do they come home Hi, honey, how are you? The traffic and this incident, and that happened and right. And they change the focus, and it changes the whole experience in the house. Like without even telling everybody else that they're changing it. They just on a subconscious level or having their family members recognize, oh, we're not talking about the things that don't work out, we're only talking about the things that are working out. Because that's how we create more and more to work out for us. And that when we focus on the things that are, you know, we're grateful for that already exists, which is massive amounts of abundance, then the experience changes for everybody in the house. And then, you know, having their you know, kids tell them things and teaching them strategies that they teach their kids so that their kids don't have to be anxious anymore. And especially nowadays, I know my kiddo just went back to school this week, and there was a lot of anxiety, getting back into school with a bunch of other people that was really sort of traumatic for her.

Damaris Grossmann: 18:42

I can only imagine. And then you've been able to give those tools to your daughter, even in your home. Has it been helpful? Has she been able as she come home a little bit less stressed out a little bit less worried?

Erin McCullough: 18:55

Well, thankfully, my father and her have a very good relationship, because she does not listen to me. That's okay. Yeah. Which is the standard. That's so funny because elderly gentleman was telling me the other day he says between 13 and 22 you are just the fool that has the money. That's it. After that, they become adults, and they go, what do you think about this?

Damaris Grossmann: 19:23

What do you think about that? I still have a little one. So I'm still gonna have to go through that at some point in my life. No, I just I really appreciate you know, you touching on your expertise and all of your thoughts. I would like to know is there someone that inspired you throughout the years or that you'd like to share or you know that or was it you were saying something about a teacher? or? Yeah, you know, it's so interesting life not a person even if just sort of just like a something

Erin McCullough: 19:58

Yeah, no, I have many mentors. This life, you know, and unfold slowly. So as we're, you know, here right now, it's difficult to see all the things but when you have moments to look back on life, you recognize there were different times and people that you met that said things and or you know, urged you to do things or introduced you to Somebody and there was definitely all those along the way. But there there are a few people that continue to mentor me from afar. I've never met them in person. But they are Gary Zhukov and Eckhart Tolle, and

Unknown: 20:43

their,

Erin McCullough: 20:46

their books are so profound that over the years, I continue to pick them up. And I hear them differently, that that's how you know the level of consciousness and those writings is deep, because it can meet you where you're at. And I can still teach you as you go along. And I highly recommend the seat of the soul and a new earth. And the power of now, which is teaching present moment awareness. A new Earth is about just consciousness in general. And that's where I learned that I wasn't my thoughts, and I'm not my emotions, actually, who I am a spectator of those things, because I can name them if I couldn't name them, then I would be my thoughts and my emotions, but since I can name them, that's how you create separateness so that you can recognize that there's a story playing out outside this movie, and there's a cast of characters and all the things and you don't have to buy into that story. And Gary Xu cough just helped me to understand the importance of this life and why we're here, what we're meant to be doing here, which is healing and growing from that story. And so, those gentlemen have had a profound effect on my life, and I'm sure many, many others

Damaris Grossmann: 22:08

can imagine No, thanks for sharing. I'd like to know, just kind of as before we go, you know, I want those to be able to reach you. But before that, once a little mindful tip that you have for the listeners and those watching the books that you had recommended. Sounds like a great tip. But if there's anything that you'd like to share just even a small something.

Erin McCullough: 22:32

So we've talked about it a couple of times, I think true freedom is in the present moment. And when we can get present in this moment, then we can focus on the things that we're most intentional about. And so one of the quick tips that I teach people is this ability, well, there's actually two that I'll teach you real quick. One is, being in the present moment requires you to sort of shut out everything else. And so the two, the two strategies I'm going to teach you is one is I always have a plant, or I can look outside at nature or something. And when you look at something for a bit, you can get curious and being a wonder about it. So I have a plant on my desk, I look at the plant. Oh, that's so interesting. Look at the veins, look at the color and wonder why it's that color. I wonder how much water and light it needs. I wonder, right? So that's one way to refocus and get here. Now. The other is a senses exercise. Also, you know, I would do like five things I can see, right. So if I'm get stressed out or anxiety or whatever's going on, or a lot going on, at work or whatever, I'll stop for a minute, and I'll say, Oh, I can see the plant and I can see that candle, I can see the chair, I can see that pillow, right. So five things and then five things I can hear maybe two or three that I can hear just right close by, I can hear the buzz in the earphones, I can hear the dog barking and then further away, I can hear the traffic on the street, I can hear the blower I can hear that lawnmower right? And so those bring you into this moment and they're a quick reset to getting right back and focus into what it is you're doing.

Damaris Grossmann: 24:26

I appreciate you giving those extra you know guidance and kind of letting people understanding the senses of within because I feel like we always just one just being in the present moment but also not really observing our our senses that we have. I appreciate you know you talking about that in general and I would love for people to connect with you on a deeper level because I believe that there's a lot a wealth of knowledge from you and many more things that they could learn and just from this short time I'd love to you know, dive deep in and get into more more information but I know that this is a short interview maybe some other time we can go into another topic or or another more in depth. So how can those reaching you at some point, one of those students or those online how can we reach you I'm going to have information on the show notes. But anything coming up directly or a website that we can

Erin McCullough: 25:28

connect? Yeah, so I have a website, Aaron er, I N dash ma si.com. And I have a book coming out soon. It's in the editing process. It should be up on Amazon, likely in the next month. Congratulations, thanks. And it's called impenetrable joy. And it talks about the processes to healing, so that we can heal from that story of all the yucky things and strategies on how to do that. We read and then also on Instagram, my handle is Aaron era n ma si LLC. And I post videos weekly, and story means inspirational story means strategies, all kinds of things on my site there.

Damaris Grossmann: 26:18

That's great when we'll be seeing your book soon. In the next month or two. Where end of the year.

Erin McCullough: 26:25

Yeah, hopefully, it's almost done editing. We'll see you hoping to get it on another. Aside from Amazon, I'm hoping to possibly get house involved, too. So

Damaris Grossmann: 26:39

that's exciting. Oh, you will do well, not possibly you will get it out into the world, your intentions there, you're going to get it. So I really appreciate you being on today. Thank you so much for your time and your inspirational and like words. I know that the listeners appreciated and the time and I look forward to them reaching out to you. Thank you so much for being on the show. Thanks so much for having me. It's important to have these conversations. I could not agree more. Well thank you guys for joining in on the mindfully integrative show and this is Dr. g. And make sure each and every day you have a mindful way. Have a good night. Bye